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Showing posts from August, 2010

Sorrow deep to the bone

I do not know which is more painful
To love and to lose
To love and not be loved back
Or not be a man anymore
He said

Silenced by his tone and the weight of his words I gave him my ear

I am one among few who dare tell such a story
One of many who face blows day in day out
Blows on my head, blows on back, kicks on my legs
You will not believe but she even held a knife
Right to my balls!
Screaming and asking, Who is the man?... Who is the man?
She lifted me up and threw me on the ground, outside
For all to see this disgusting fight

Then,

She laughed … celebrating her victory
Amongst cheers from the female neighbors
Men around embarrassed on my behalf
Clicking and disgusted, shaking their heads in disbelief
And they asked

Huyu ni mwanaume kweli?
They asked if I was a man!

They say that love is blind… all this while I was blinded
I don’t know why I stayed!
Don’t ask me why I stayed…
I accepted each apology, if she apologized
Cover up the bruises, until she took the fight outside!
I …

We, so much like cockroaches!

Scratching more so deeply when the lights are out
Other beings when the sun is long gone
No we hide, wear masks during the day
It is the only way to get ahead with something, with someone

We, hiding in the dark only watching the bold ones take their efforts to the lighter zones
Yes waiting, knowing that if they come back unharmed
Then they are the heroes and heroines

We, so much like cockroaches
Know that the best things in life happen all at once,
They fall down like a bread crumbs under the shadow of the table
And since tomorrow may not come… we race for it
At that frozen fastest second, our near death experience
We forget that we are the almost crashed cockroach


We, so much like cockroaches
See us break into a doodle dance and circling when they spray some motin doom
Oh yes it’s our doom we know
The world indeed is a cycle and everything in it goes round in circles
It is no place for squares and you will need more than enough if you have 3 corners
We like cockroaches should know …

Dearest Friend...... A dedication to Molly

This letter was written on April 11, 2009 at 9:17pm

Dearest friend,

I hope that you have arrived well and that you are feeling better now. The last time I saw you, the last time I touched you... those last few minutes I had tears in my eyes, no I actually cried out loud. The universe is really cruel because that day the sun was so bright, I was so close but there was nothing I could do.

The last time we were together dearest friend I experienced two totally different feelings. I thought I should let you know.

Regret. I still feel that there was something I could have done. He put you to rest in a terrible way, I hate him for that. I am so sorry that I let you down buddy, more so sorry that it took me, us ages to realize that something was wrong. And Sorry again because maybe it seemed that I did not care.

Pain. Excruciating pain deep inside my heart. Every minute of every hour that passed on... me staring you helpless: My heart was weeping for you baby until you turned still, very s…

Just before I lose the will to T-R-Y

It is times like these that I wish you would whisper
Right into my ear so no one else would hear
Show me the way; give me some sign in some way
Perform a miracle, work in me work on me
Just before I lose the will to t-r-y

It is times like these he said, when I want you to massage my ego
Give me a bath, soak with me, listen and watch my eagles
Because someday for you they will touch the sky
Perform a miracle, work in me work on me
Just before I lose the will to t-r-y

It is times like these my love she said, when I want you to just sit with me
Say nothing baby, rub my back give me a massage
Today we chill just you and me as we listen and talk
Tonight I am attentive, inspire me challenge me
Perform a miracle, work in me work on me
Just before I lose the will to t-r-y

It is times like these she prayed, when I wished that someone would hear me
Sit with me find out what is wrong and direct me to the right direction
Pat my back and tell me that you are proud of me
Believe in me
Perform a mir…

Una nguvu jamani

Una nguvu jamani
Uwezo usiofahamika
Kunivuta kabisa
Kunishtua ajabu
Kunifanya wazimu

Unanguvu jamani
Wanibeba wanibembeleza
Na hata waniandalia meza!
Wa uta majivuno nani angeweza?

Unanguvu jamani
Nimeona nizielezee
Natamani niwewako milele
Niwe mfungwa wa mapenzi wako wee
Nizihisi nguvu hizo
Nguvu za ajabu
Unanguvu jamani

The Sound of my silence!!!

If my silence could express itself to you
Then it would whisper some sort of break through
Saying...
Death to the times of sitting at the window and trying to revive a dead shadow
Death to the hopes and dreams of our better tomorrow
Death to our kind of love

The sound of silence would cry
Mapenzi ya kweli kama ya maji mazuri ya ziwa la mesopotamia ni hadithi tu
Oungo mkubwa!
Nimekubali mwiba kuishi moyoni
Nikama nimetumbukizwa katika dibwi la simanzi
Dibwi la giza totoro... njia ndefu isiyo na mwisho,
Nimechoka! Nimechoka na kutamani

Ulichonifunza mwalimu siku zile za jadi;
Sikuzile zetu
Mbona wewe mwenyewe kasahau?
The sound of my silence would ask you
Je ni kweli kuwa moyo wako ulitekwa nyara na kuekewa dawa
Mbona naona ni kama mimi na wewe tunaishi katika ndoto mbaya
Ndoto inayonifanya ni tiririkwe na machozi bila haya
Inayonifanya ni hisi uchungu ule ule mbaya kama wa mama kupoteza mwana
Nimeona niwache kung’oja

Haifai! For the broken curve to be a comfort
Kwa mtu yeyote kuloa …